28. Stubborn fairy

        Still no sign of the fairy.  I’m worried for her safety.  Poor little Bonnie.  She might be hiding in the house.  I want to hope so anyway, but I haven’t seen her, and with each passing day it seems more unlikely.  She has a talent for going unobserved when she wants too, and she’s very clever.  Once, at Unger’s house, I saw her cross a room full of people without being seen, like she was invisible, only she wasn’t.  She has an uncanny talent for knowing when people are looking her way.  At school once, she flew along the ceiling of a crowded classroom in Chem Lab without being noticed.   So she might be here, in the house, without my knowing it.
        Why won’t she make herself known to me?  On several occasions, whenever both Mom and Brian are out of the house, I go from room to room calling her name, and telling her I’m sorry, and that I take back my order that she leave.  Nothing.  No response.  I even tried giving new orders for her to appear, but again no response.
        I have seen signs though.  First I tried leaving food out, honey on crackers, and pop tarts, two of her favorites, but she didn’t take the bait.  So I spilled a few drops of honey on the counter, like it was an accident, and ran my finger through the honey to smear it thin.  The next morning the smear of honey looked smaller.  It has to be her, but I’m not sure.  Could have been mice.  The following night I did the same thing and spilt some milk on the counter, and again the next morning, it looked like some was missing.  I also found an open box of cereal in the cupboards.  Could have been her, or it could have been Brian.  So now I leave food out every night; lots of it, so she doesn’t have to be careful about being discovered.  I don’t want her to go hungry.
        Also I noticed one morning her clothes appeared to have been disturbed, just a little, but definitely moved some, and some articles missing.  I think she may have taken several of the Barbie Doll outfits.  Not sure though.
        At first I was leaving the window and screen to my room open, so she could return home at the first opportunity.  But then I thought if she’s in the house, perhaps I should shut them up tight so she can’t leave.  No, I don’t want to keep her a prisoner again, not against her wishes.  So I leave the window and screen open.  Not sure she’s really back anyway.
        I did a minutely detailed thorough search of every crack and crevice of the house on Wednesday, looking for any signs of the fairy.  In the attic I found a roof vent at the corner gables where the slats had been pried apart.  It sure looked like someone small had made themselves an exit.  Could have been Bonnie.  Probably was, but also could have been pigeons or squirrels.  I’m sure it wasn’t that way a few weeks ago, when Bonnie and I fortified the house against fairy attacks and gnome invasions.  I put tiny pieces of thread across the opening to see they would be disturbed, and sure enough, the next day I found the thread pushed was off to one side the next day.  Could have been the breeze though.
        I sought out Madison again yesterday and we discussed the possibilities in great detail over some burgers and fries at a MacDonald’s.  Madison was sympathetic, but she’s convinced Bonnie won’t ever show herself again.  Not to me anyway.  I rehearsed my last words to the fairy and we dissected them in great detail.  Bonnie said she wouldn’t go unless I ordered her too.  So I ordered her to go.  Then Bonnie said she was bound by oath to obey my commandments.  I was so stupid, I said “Go, I command it.  I never want to see another fairy again, especially you.”  Never is a long time.  It makes me sad.
        Then Bonnie left out the window.  She might have come back though.  She doesn’t have anywhere else to go.  The other fairies have banished her from their presence.  She has no way to return home to the realm of fairies.  It’s dangerous outside, especially at night.  Where else can she go?  She knows she can safe here.  She knows I care for her, and that I’ll protect her.  She has to come back.
        So I think she must be in the house somewhere, even if I can’t find her.  At least here she has a warm place to stay, out of the elements, and away from her enemies.  But I do wish she would come out of hiding and things could go back to the way they were.  I really do miss her.
        There’s still the problem of Bonnie being a party to the fairy expedition that tried to steal little Amie.  That worries me.  Madison and I have taken precautions to ensure Amie’s safety against future attacks.  Madison got her parents to switch bedrooms around so now Madison shares a bedroom with Amie and can keep an eye on her at night, and Madison makes sure the doors and windows are always shut and locked.  She also makes sure Amie is never outside unaccompanied, and is never ever left alone in the house, especially at night or at dawn and dusk.  We haven’t molested the mushrooms, too dangerous, they’re being guarded by warrior fairies, but we have been watching for full moons.  No signs of trouble so far.  Maybe the fairies gave up on trying to steal Amie and went home without her, but we can’t be sure.
        This morning I let my worries get the best of me and made a huge mess in the house trying to find the little fairy.  I searched everywhere, looking in every corner, under every piece of furniture, behind every curtain, in every cupboard.  Nothing.  Bonnie is being stubborn.  She has to be here.  It’s so frustrating.  If she doesn’t want me to find her, there’s no way I will.  Every time I bend down to look under something, I imagine her flying out of that room into another where I’ve already searched.
        It’s driving me crazy knowing she’s in the house, but not being able to see her or talk to her.  I have to think of some way to make things right between us.

      January 18, 2013

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